love or evol?

Hey guys its CheyS,
recently I've been in a dark place mentally and physically,
which is why it took me awhile to post....
so many things have happened that ive kept quiet about and it really sucks,
theres really nobody I can turn to that has good intentions for me,
my family is there but they dont understand and im pretty sure all of them have lost hope in me,
im 22 and have accomplished nothing in the last 4 years (when i graduated high school)
Love?
I love the man im with but i feel like ive overstayed my welcome....
I feel like im annoying because i want to be around all the time.
Being with him had made me feel normal for some strange reason, but now i feel like a burden...
So, ive come to the conclusion that I need to just be alone
If im alone, nobody will be worried about me, i won't be clingy to anyone, i won't be used by anyone.
I just dont know whats wrong with me.
I really do hate myself sometimes....
all the time....
Ive been this way since my birthday a month ago...
i also feel like with the loss of my baby, that ive lost my purpose.
I think about him every day,
Ive had vivid dreams of him....
If i could have one wish I would wish for my baby....
Ive lost all the love ive had in me, with the loss of my child.
so there is no such thing as love,
its literally all evol (pronounced close to evil)
RIP my little angel 2/11/18
Image result for miscarriage

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